As another reminder of Disney owninga good chunkof the thing we fuck , the company ’s freshly relaunched , limited time Bedtime Hotline service has added some characters from its most democratic acquisition . One of them I experience maybe has kind of the opposite effect of order your kid to passive quietus , though .

Last year , Disney found the Bedtime Hotline as a way of life for parents to let kids get a extra goodnight message from one of the classic Disney icons : Mickey , Minnie , Donald , Daisy , or Goofy . But for the next two week , to celebrate a new line of sleepwear for kidslaunching on its webstore , the company has brought the service back with some extra addition .

AsPolygonreports , as well as the original Disney stars , call the toll - complimentary number 1 - 877 - 7 - MICKEY now collapse parent the chance to learn a bedtime message from Toy Story ’s Woody , Frozen ’s Elsa and Anna , or two rather more peculiar addition : Yoda correspond Star Wars , and Spider - Man representing Marvel . Naturally , because we ’re still children that just happen to occupy the aged , crumbling sacks of meat and bones of adults , we had to give it a try for ourselves . Who does n’t desire anancient Jedi Masteror one of themost beloved superheroesin the globe telling them to get to seam ?

Yoda, preparing for a nap of his own. Sort of. He’s just resting his eyes forever, kids.

Yoda, preparing for a nap of his own. Sort of. He’s just resting his eyes forever, kids.Image: Lucasfilm

https://gizmodo.com/chip-zdarskys-farewell-to-spectacular-spider-man-is-a-h-1829224412

Do n’t expect Tom Holland — it’d bea tad awkwardat this point — when you select Spider - Man . It ’s a generic , cheerful , very chipper Spidey who ’s a act more in line with Robbie Daymond ’s take on the fibre from the Disney XD Spider - Man show . He’s … sort of rude , actually , tell your kid about his own day and how he ’s tired too , so they peradventure should get to sleep too . It ’s more about Spidey , and less about your kid needing to get in layer :

The Yoda call , however … is something . Like Spidey , this is intelligibly not Frank Oz , but does a good enough job ( it ’s unconfirmed , but it seems like it could be Tom Kane , who voice Yoda in a litany of Star Wars cloth like The Clone Wars , Rebels , and video recording game ) .

Argentina’s President Javier Milei (left) and Robert F. Kennedy Jr., holding a chainsaw in a photo posted to Kennedy’s X account on May 27. 2025.

It ’s not that part that ’s unearthly though . It ’s the bit of the subject matter where , after the very cunning doctrine of analogy that the Force is like a blanket — just , y’know , for existence — it ’s the bit where he develop trippy about what your minor can expect in their beddy - byes dreaming :

Yoda . Buddy . What are you doing ? You think a kid who demand to get some sleep needs to get a line that their ambition encompass all of fourth dimension and distance , are real , and that you will see them there inside the dream ? If that ’s not enough to gear up a kidskin ’s capitulum spinning with experiential crises , I do n’t know what it is .

Anyway , if you want to give your child the minatory message that should they close their oculus and go to bed tonight , a chuckle little infinite goblin wizard will watch them in their deepest subconscious , you may call up the Disney Bedtime Hotline now — but do it quick , it ’s only running between today and September 30 .

William Duplessie

For more , make trusted you ’re following us on our new Instagram @io9dotcom .

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